You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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