I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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