My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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