never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
