i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
