she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
He told me they were just razor bumps!
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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