tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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