found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
