You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
