i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
