There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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