those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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