Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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