and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
You were trust falling into bushes
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
