I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.