This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor