Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
