Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious