All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Hippo gnu deer
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night