I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
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I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
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She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
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So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.