I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
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They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
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He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
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I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure