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    (502): View more from Kentucky

    I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.

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    Replies (4) Good night (2876) Bad night (558) Order T-Shirt
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    (410): View more from Maryland

    So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.

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    Replies (41) Good night (3535) Bad night (1014) Order T-Shirt
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    (603): View more from New Hampshire

    I just threw up on my dentist

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    Replies (20) Good night (814) Bad night (3151) Order T-Shirt
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    (201): View more from New Jersey

    At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."

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    Replies (42) Good night (5886) Bad night (583) Order T-Shirt
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    (585): View more from New York

    Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?

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    Replies (59) Good night (3738) Bad night (548) Order T-Shirt
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    (219): View more from Indiana

    Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.

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    Replies (36) Good night (21336) Bad night (2981) Order T-Shirt
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    (512): View more from Texas

    were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.

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    Replies (2) Good night (1870) Bad night (1003) Order T-Shirt
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    (512): View more from Texas

    clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.

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    Replies (10) Good night (592) Bad night (1552) Order T-Shirt
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    (440): View more from Ohio

    wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant

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    Replies (54) Good night (1230) Bad night (15572) Order T-Shirt
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    (908): View more from New Jersey

    im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis

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    Replies (14) Good night (3375) Bad night (609) Order T-Shirt
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    (733): View more from

    i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now

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    Replies (3) Good night (2315) Bad night (1101) Order T-Shirt
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    (412): View more from Pennsylvania

    The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.

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    Replies (32) Good night (824) Bad night (3356) Order T-Shirt
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    (559): View more from California

    my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.

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    Replies (10) Good night (4433) Bad night (468) Order T-Shirt
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    (703): View more from Virginia

    worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.

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    Replies (5) Good night (513) Bad night (3649) Order T-Shirt
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    (715): View more from Wisconsin

    Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.

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    Replies (28) Good night (1047) Bad night (3794) Order T-Shirt
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  • (859): The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow http://t.co/sQOeFAaf
  • (270): him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
  • (627): The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
  • (402): Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
  • (724): A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
  • (303): Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.

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