Texts From Last Night

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(304): View more from West Virginia

its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.

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(304): its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god. http://tfl.nu/qi32

Replies (5) Good night (6554) Bad night (699)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on

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(412): i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on http://tfl.nu/87g6

Replies (38) Good night (6042) Bad night (1057)
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(770): View more from Georgia

The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.

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(770): The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end. http://tfl.nu/4vu6

Replies (24) Good night (692) Bad night (3760)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.

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(701): My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying. http://tfl.nu/rpdb

Replies (32) Good night (7121) Bad night (698)
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(408): View more from California

just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious

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(408): just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious http://tfl.nu/av2y

Replies (11) Good night (4548) Bad night (600)
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(540): View more from Virginia

I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.

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(540): I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down. http://tfl.nu/t10x

Replies (12) Good night (2819) Bad night (655)
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(229): View more from Georgia

so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.

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(229): so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing. http://tfl.nu/p809

Replies (26) Good night (2699) Bad night (989)
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(518): View more from New York

Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.

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(518): Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower. http://tfl.nu/xf7t

Replies (17) Good night (4834) Bad night (734)
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(562): View more from California

I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.

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(562): I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial. http://tfl.nu/180u

Replies (25) Good night (597) Bad night (4559)
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(520): View more from Arizona

His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now

(310): View more from California

Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...

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(520): His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now (310): Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok... http://tfl.nu/uoe6

Replies (14) Good night (4292) Bad night (1061)
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(602): View more from Arizona

you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.

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(602): you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer. http://tfl.nu/7uxe

Replies (16) Good night (6133) Bad night (554)
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(940): View more from Texas

I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.

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(940): I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night. http://tfl.nu/ldko

Replies (16) Good night (895) Bad night (3577)
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(806): View more from Texas

This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.

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(806): This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night. http://tfl.nu/k0hc

Replies (15) Good night (637) Bad night (3071)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.

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(860): Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious. http://tfl.nu/hqob

Replies (10) Good night (3697) Bad night (529)
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(224): View more from Illinois

U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.

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(224): U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here. http://tfl.nu/6777

Replies (57) Good night (819) Bad night (3880)

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