If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.