at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
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i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
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She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
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You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.