In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
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you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.