I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
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I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.