Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.