YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.