Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Send us your Text From Last Night!
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.