I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half