He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
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is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
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i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.