all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.