Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
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the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences In Dating Men And Women
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.