No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.