Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....