Texts From Last Night

Texts from August, 2011

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  (406): View more from Montana

  Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar

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  (406): Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar http://tfl.nu/9n3o
  Replies (6) Good night (1255) Bad night (498) Order T-Shirt
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.

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  (260): If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately. http://tfl.nu/6wdr
  Replies (8) Good night (640) Bad night (1675)
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  (44): View more from United Kingdom

  I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.

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  (44): I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game. http://tfl.nu/cpwc
  Replies (2) Good night (1282) Bad night (402) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee

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  (315): i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee http://tfl.nu/vhng
  Replies (8) Good night (1871) Bad night (476) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.

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  (510): It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him. http://tfl.nu/gszx
  Replies (4) Good night (2935) Bad night (551) Order T-Shirt
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  (646): View more from New York

  Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.

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  (646): Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN. http://tfl.nu/7ja8
  Replies (4) Good night (1840) Bad night (462) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks

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  (604): Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks http://tfl.nu/m24y
  Replies (6) Good night (2667) Bad night (472)
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  (347): View more from New York

  They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me

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  (347): They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me http://tfl.nu/nbj5
  Replies (4) Good night (1239) Bad night (518) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book

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  (516): I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book http://tfl.nu/reox
  Replies (5) Good night (2124) Bad night (527) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.

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  (917): After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment. http://tfl.nu/hjie
  Replies (7) Good night (698) Bad night (1503) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.

  (845): View more from New York

  Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.

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  (607): Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up. (845): Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity. http://tfl.nu/u2xk
  Replies (5) Good night (1806) Bad night (474)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.

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  (843): The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own. http://tfl.nu/b2cm
  Replies (1) Good night (2838) Bad night (418) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.

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  (203): I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight. http://tfl.nu/nwmv
  Replies (6) Good night (969) Bad night (1399) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.

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  (717): Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene. http://tfl.nu/3l38
  Replies (8) Good night (4020) Bad night (452) Order T-Shirt
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.

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  (229): No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional. http://tfl.nu/bawb
  Replies (7) Good night (2441) Bad night (990) Order T-Shirt