That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
21 Disappointing Confessions From Teenage Fathers
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.