Just look for the house with the beer knights.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...