Texts From Last Night

Texts from April, 2011

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  (913): View more from Kansas

  did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.

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  (913): did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box. http://tfl.nu/h01u
  Replies (10) Good night (2915) Bad night (1278) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up

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  (707): please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up http://tfl.nu/kqwh
  Replies (9) Good night (1706) Bad night (1451) Order T-Shirt
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall

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  (219): I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall http://tfl.nu/2grv
  Replies (10) Good night (2435) Bad night (1516) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.

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  (612): Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things. http://tfl.nu/vads
  Replies (9) Good night (3856) Bad night (1177) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....

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  (217): it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning.... http://tfl.nu/jakw
  Replies (5) Good night (2301) Bad night (1217) Order T-Shirt
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  (915): View more from Texas

  I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper

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  (915): I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper http://tfl.nu/xgjg
  Replies (16) Good night (3655) Bad night (1154) Order T-Shirt
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.

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  (306): My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday. http://tfl.nu/tgen
  Replies (2) Good night (1735) Bad night (1602) Order T-Shirt
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  (889): View more from

  found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.

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  (889): found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint. http://tfl.nu/70ee
  Replies (3) Good night (2316) Bad night (933) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.

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  (770): Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar. http://tfl.nu/qm52
  Replies (10) Good night (1830) Bad night (1037)
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  (716): View more from New York

  her body is proportioned like a family guy character

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  (716): her body is proportioned like a family guy character http://tfl.nu/ptef
  Replies (15) Good night (1130) Bad night (3801) Order T-Shirt
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window

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  (613): on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window http://tfl.nu/tz9a
  Replies (2) Good night (2044) Bad night (1211) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be

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  (704): Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be http://tfl.nu/xbn0
  Replies (10) Good night (4671) Bad night (1227) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?

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  (910): Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe? http://tfl.nu/5w16
  Replies (6) Good night (1256) Bad night (1724) Order T-Shirt
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.

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  (563): She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me. http://tfl.nu/so2a
  Replies (35) Good night (7480) Bad night (1226) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.

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  (512): I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings. http://tfl.nu/0ge6
  Replies (10) Good night (2179) Bad night (1425) Order T-Shirt