ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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