haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize