Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
