I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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