I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
