I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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