I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I just want nice things and good sex
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
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