No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
