Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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