____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.