Texts From Last Night

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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose

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  (262): Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose http://tfl.nu/nksk
  Replies (3) Good night (784) Bad night (1171)
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  (831): View more from California

  You should get sea herpes

  (831): View more from California

  I mean sea horses

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  (831): You should get sea herpes (831): I mean sea horses http://tfl.nu/2vm6
  Replies (21) Good night (3836) Bad night (789)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.

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  (715): he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut. http://tfl.nu/y3au
  Replies (13) Good night (4673) Bad night (1066)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning

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  (937): I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning http://tfl.nu/bu5f
  Replies (22) Good night (1229) Bad night (5862)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.

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  (407): I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk. http://tfl.nu/exk9
  Replies (25) Good night (6648) Bad night (1045)
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  (914): View more from New York

  all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is

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  (914): all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is http://tfl.nu/2h7o
  Replies (6) Good night (6046) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.

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  (813): that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE. http://tfl.nu/ha03
  Replies (21) Good night (4419) Bad night (973)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.

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  (508): It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode. http://tfl.nu/vudg
  Replies (4) Good night (2404) Bad night (632)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right

  (631): View more from New York

  Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15

  (585): View more from New York

  hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos

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  (585): Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right (631): Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15 (585): hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos http://tfl.nu/8bsi
  Replies (8) Good night (2230) Bad night (622)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog

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  (907): You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog http://tfl.nu/ud9g
  Replies (6) Good night (1097) Bad night (563)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment

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  (610): How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment http://tfl.nu/bnot
  Replies (4) Good night (707) Bad night (392)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.

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  (919): Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds. http://tfl.nu/9jhi
  Replies (8) Good night (437) Bad night (950)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.

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  (614): I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD. http://tfl.nu/na70
  Replies (2) Good night (597) Bad night (270)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?

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  (425): He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions? http://tfl.nu/lmc7
  Replies (2) Good night (719) Bad night (430)
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  (726): View more from

  Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.

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  (726): Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen. http://tfl.nu/potb
  Replies (5) Good night (616) Bad night (237)

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