too bad you live with your parents still
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
operation harelip BJ is a go
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
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I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
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The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks